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Thursday, 05 February 2009

  • Happiness

    So in having a conversation with JP today.. i revealed that there really only seems to be one thing that im truly happy doing anymore.  Sports dont really do it. movies, no. just hanging out with friends, not really.  The only thing that does it is Jesus and doing what He wants me to do.  talking to ppl and witnessing and sharing the gospel. so fun, even when old guys tell you to buzz off :P

    On a different note.. I am really thankful to have Josh Parry as a friend.  These past weeks when things could have went much better, he has been the encouragement i've needed so i dont totally tank it.  Like when he says "i miss your face.. really :)"  Kinda lifts me up when at times i seem to be getting pummeled by the Devil.

    tats all fer now ;)
    (ps love ya Avery!! :D)



Tuesday, 20 January 2009

  • Oh today

    The first half of today has kind of been a botched day.  I got through it somehow, grace of God.  The past 3 days I didn't do devos, which once again I realize how much not spending time, or spending time with God effects my life.  And it seems to just build either way.  But today I read a bit, but walking downtown I asked God simply which way to walk.  I walked the way I thought I was supposed to and continued to pray and think.  I walked by this girl, Amanda Rankin, that I've played volleyball with past semesters (she's the setter for the CU girls).  She is also coincidently in my intro to accounting class this semester and asked me to sit with her the other day.  So i walked by, and she didnt really recognize me, I had a hat on and was sort of walking with my head down.  I debated on whether to say anything but didnt and walked right by.  As soon as I got by a little voice went through my head, "That was your chance, thats why I wanted you to walk this way."  Crap.  Failed again.  Hopefully I'll be able to hear/listen better next time.  Anyway, leading cell group tonight.  Not really nervous, but I just dont know how it will go.  I've never done anything like this before really, so we'll see.

Sunday, 09 November 2008

  • Real People

    This is a paper I wrote for a class, but it gives a rundown of my week kinda.. and i dont feel like writing more about it right now so.. here tis

    This week was very long for me.  Not a bad long though, it was really good.  Last weekend there was a Christian conference that myself and over 90 other people from the surrounding campuses went to.  Then on Monday night a bunch of my friends and I hung out in Canton at a mutual friends house.  We goofed off a lot, ate Chinese food with chopsticks out of the box, and then probably the highlight of my week, we had a four hour long prophetic prayer meeting that lasted until about 2am the next morning (Tuesday also happened to be my birthday).  We also had cake, which my friend Laura made for me, and ice-cream to celebrate.  Wednesday in my world religions class we had a guest speaker by the name of John Ault come in and speak to the class about Christianity, I was very excited for this.  To finish out my week I attended three Christian outreach concerts that were at Clarkson, SLU, and Potsdam.  I also hung out afterwards until the wee hours of the morning on Friday and Saturday.  All of this is to give the background for the topic of discussion.  I spent a lot of time around some people that I knew but never really hung out with, didn’t really know.  This may not seem out of the ordinary except for the fact that we were real.

                    On our way to the conference Friday, one of the travelers in my car suggested that we play the game “I have never.”  I was a bit surprised at this, knowing that the game usually leads into some questions that people generally do not want to talk about, and this was a Christian group.  Needless to say, the hard questions were asked.  People had to delve into their past and reveal things that they had done that maybe they weren’t all too proud of.  But I believe this is a good thing.  This is how you get close, and how true friendships are built.  Even after the two and a half hour car ride I felt like I knew these people and that we were really friends, true friends, and I felt so much closer.  After the conference, on the car ride home, we got into another discussion.  This time it was about what God had said to us and taught us at the conference.  Both car rides required a serious amount of vulnerability, and I think that this vulnerability is what really produces good, true friendships.

                    Now onto Monday evening.  I found myself really seeing the character of many of the people that were there that night.  By just really spending time with people, caring, and spending time with God I felt closer to them.  Not to mention usually at these types of things there is a lot of encouragement, and struggles get dealt with.  Two of my friends one in particular, had never really opened up to people.  They didn’t trust people enough to let them know what was really going on with them.  Well, they opened up.  There was some crying, but it was good, it was necessary.  They were vulnerable.  They became true friends.

                    Wednesday night I ended up driving to Wal-Mart with 3 friends, in which we all managed to pack into a three-seater pick up (sshh, don’t tell!!).  A certain song came on the radio (it was a favorite) and the driver busted out singing.  This might not seem out of the ordinary, but this person has a tendency to sometimes be self conscious, especially about singing.  Let’s just say that singing is not her strongest gift from God.  Even though it may not sound the best, I still absolutely love it when she does sing because it releases some vulnerability.  We also got it on video, which was an even bigger surprise!

                    This week was amazing for me.  It feels like I discovered a whole bunch of new friends, friends that are real, and friends that can be counted on.  I think that many relationships in today’s society lack this vulnerability, and as a result the true friendship is non-existent.  People need to be real.  They need to be vulnerable.  That is where the best friendships and relationships come from.



Saturday, 27 September 2008

  • Changes

    i've been thinking lately. about me. about how i'm not the person i want to be. about how i can't seem to find the self motivation to do things. laziness? i hate it and somehow i don't know how to get away from it. i think about how much of a "crap bag" i can be sometimes.
    Then i think about God. how forgiving. how dependable. how faithful. even when i am not always the person i should be. Mold me into the person you want me to be.
    I think about the people that have been most influential in my life lately.  Jon. Rick. Mr Daniels. Louisa. Dri.  I am very greatful and thank you all :)

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